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6. You guys have never shared a meal together nor talk of feeding each other in a romantic way.
7. If you have shared a meal together, it was either late-night pizza or hungover morning bagels.
8. He whatsapps you more than he calls you.
9. You’ve never been on a real date with him.
10. …If you have been on a date, it was one time. And it never happened again.
11. You’ve never spoken on the phone unless it was 4 am, and you needed him to buzz you up to his place.
12. He makes really big promises that he literally never keeps.
13. He never wants to hang out in the morning.
